“What did you say to Papa, Hannah? You’ve made him cry.” Eli plopped down beside them. She couldn’t help but notice that Hannah’s eyes were red, too.
“And Hannah’s doppelgänger just had to put in her two-cent’s worth,” Papa said, smiling. “How are you this morning, Eli?”
“I…I don’t know, Papa. I’m not sure I want to…talk about it right now.”
“I suppose listening to your Mama and I telling you that none of your past was your fault just isn’t enough and apparently, never has been. But you should talk to your mother again, Eli, now that you have no secrets from yourself any longer. Perhaps she can better help you now.”
Help her with what, Rich?” Elaine sat down next to him.
“Eli still hasn’t dealt with her past, Elaine. I fully understand it; she’s getting older. So I thought that, with your perspective, you might be able to help her better than I could.
“Of course, Eli. Any time you want to talk, I’m here. But for a different perspective altogether, Sava seemed to be far more effective at it than I, and in a much shorter period of time. I think he dressed you and Oskar down quite effectively in the cave. He’s a man of few, but quite effective, words.” She squeezed Eli’s hand.
“Where’s Jack, Mrs. Dawson?” Hannah looked over Papa’s shoulder towards the back porch.
“He…thought it would be better if he came back later this afternoon, after you’re feeling better, Hannah.”
“But, I didn’t mean…It wasn’t his fault, Mrs. Dawson.” She fought back the urge to cry again. What’s wrong with me? I almost never cry.
He’s sure it is, Hannah. And I didn’t feel it was my place to talk him out of it.
Hannah carefully pulled herself together and sat down next to Eli. “I hope you’re not angry with me, Eli. I really wanted to help you, but I’m afraid now that I may have messed things up for you. You buried those things for a reason.”
“But I buried them for the wrong reasons, Hannah. I’m not sure I would have stood it if I hadn’t, but still it was for the wrong reasons.”
“What does that mean, Eli?” Mama looked at her intently. “What would the right reasons be?”
“I guess there aren’t any right reasons, Mama. I did it because remembering what I did to poor Isak hurt too much.”
“Who’s Isak?”
Eli started to explain, but Papa put his hand up. “Don’t, Eli. Hannah and I will fill her in later.
“Okay, Papa.” She breathed a sigh of relief.
Oskar sat down beside her and kissed her on the cheek. “Are you feeling better?”
She leaned her head on his shoulder. “I am now that you’re here.”
Oskar felt the intensity of her feelings wash over him and instinctively put his arm around her. He felt so helpless at times like these, because he knew there was nothing he could do to help her.
“You’re here, Oskar. That’s all I need,” she whispered.
He kissed her again, but he still remembered the Eli in the cave; the Eli who had tried to leave without him, leaving him with nothing but the false hope that he might someday find her again. He quickly suppressed the thought, relieved that she hadn’t caught it.
Breakfast was quieter than usual, but only because everyone was still mentally exhausted after all the turmoil of the last several days. Finished at last, Eli, Oskar and Hannah sat together on the porch swing; Oskar, as usual, sandwiched between them.
“I think I’m going to go talk to Sava, Oskar. Is that okay?” Eli asked.
“Sure! I’ll go with you. When do you want to go? After dinner?”
“No, Oskar. Now. I want to go now, but I’d like to…go alone if that’s all right.”
He hid his disappointment. “Okay, Eli. But isn’t he asleep?”
“No, Oskar. He already told me he’d be happy to talk to her. He’s waiting for her at home.” Hannah grinned at him.
“Well! I guess that settles it then!” Eli hurried down the porch steps and out the front gate.
“What do you wanna do until she gets back, Hannah? I know! Let’s go swimming.”
“I…I think I’m going to talk to your Mom, Oskar. I asked her at breakfast, remember?”
“Yeah, but I thought…” he shrugged his shoulders. “Okay, Hannah, I guess I’ll just…read a book or something.”
“Sorry, Oskar,” she got up and hurried back inside. Elaine saw her coming and motioned her into the living room, leaving Oskar alone on the porch swing. He readjusted the cushions, spread himself out, and leaned his head on the armrest. From here he had a great view of the living room, and Hannah seemed a bit upset. He watched them intently, curious as to what they might be talking about that she couldn’t or wouldn’t share with Eli and him.
§
“Hi Janice! Hi Ryan! Hi Jason!” Eli had just turned off White road onto the path towards Sava’s house when the three of them came jogging by. Both boys, perspiring heavily, had their shirts tied around their waists, and Janice’s headband was no longer able to keep the sweat out of her eyes. “How long have you been running?”
“We started at the lighthouse, Eli,” Ryan panted. He stopped, leaned over and braced himself, hands on his knees, breathing heavily. “Where are you going?”
“To see Sava. You look thirsty! Why don’t you rest for a while before you start back and let Sava give you something to drink?”
“I dunno, Eli. What’s he got to offer?” Ryan asked, suspiciously.
“Ha, ha. Very funny, Ryan. Come on!” she turned and headed up the sidewalk.
“Is he even up, Eli? Doesn’t he sleep in the daytime?” Janice asked.
“Why does everyone ask that question? We stay awake when it’s dark. Why wouldn’t a vampire stay awake in the daytime? I did it all the time, especially after I met Oskar.” she knocked on the door.
“Come in, Eli. And close the doors behind you, please.”
“Ryan, Janice, and Jason have been jogging and would like some water, Sava. Is it okay if they come in for just a minute?”
There was a long pause. “Of course. Come in. All of you.”
Ryan had already shut the foyer door behind them when he remembered, too late, Dr. Dawson’s cautionary advice regarding his tattoo. All he could do now was try to keep his back out of Sava’s sight and hope he wouldn’t notice.
“Will ice water do? Or is that to be avoided when you’re overheated?”
“Regular tap water would be better, Sava, but thanks anyway,” Janice smiled at him.
“Forgive me. I’m unfamiliar with the… rituals of jogging. Running just for the fun of it is an…odd idea to me.” He carefully filled three glasses from the faucet, placed them on the counter and stepped back, a half-smile on his face.
Jason and Janice helped themselves, but Ryan hesitated, trying to keep Eli between himself and Sava. He stole a glance at Sava and was startled to see he was staring directly at him.
“Nice tattoo, Ryan. Anyone I know?” he smirked.
“Eli giggled, “It’s supposed to be you, Sava.”
Ryan thought fast. “It couldn’t be, Eli. Sava’s not that good-looking.”
Sava laughed heartily, “I certainly won’t argue with you. But what on earth made you do such a thing?”
“First you have to tell me how you spotted it. I’ve kept my back from you the whole time we’ve been here.”
Sava smiled and nodded toward the full-length mirror next to the front door.
“Of course! A mirror in the home of a vampire. Who would’ve thought? I guess you got me fair and square, then.”
“Ryan fancies himself an artist, Sava. And after meeting you, he just couldn’t resist. You’re a sort of…dark hero to him.” Janice grabbed Ryan firmly by the shoulders and turned him around. “What do you think? I like it. It looks just like I imagine you would look if you were…angry.”
Sava laughed again. “Very diplomatically put, Janice.” He pretended to examine Ryan’s back carefully. “The claws and talons are a bit exaggerated, but the rest looks…authentic enough.” He winked at Eli. “You’re a good artist, Ryan. And the person who did the work is a good artisan.”
“Then you aren’t offended that I….”
“Not at all! I’m actually a bit flattered. But I find it sadly ironic that you’re the only one here who can’t directly view your own work.”
“Actually, I still have the original. You are looking at the only copy.” He grinned at Sava, then grabbed his glass off the counter and drank it down.
“Well then! Is there anything else the three of you need? If not…” Sava started for the door.
Jason hurried ahead of him, opened the inner door and let the others into the foyer. “Thanks, Sava.” He hesitated, “and thanks for…looking after Hannah and Eli,” he said softly.
“My pleasure, Jason.” He made sure the door was closed behind them. “Hannah is lucky to have Jason as a brother, Eli.”
She smiled at him. “I know, Sava. He really loves her.”
He sat down on the couch. “Now then, Eli. What can I do for you?
Eli sat down next to him and put her arm through his, took a deep breath, and... “How did you become a vampire, Sava?”
§
“What is it you wanted to talk to me about, Hannah?” Elaine sat down on the couch opposite her.
“It’s about Jack, Mrs. Dawson.” She looked down at her feet, embarrassed.
“I thought as much. What on earth happened in there? I thought you and Jack were the best of friends.”
“We are! Except…” she stopped. How could she explain what she was thinking? “Jack…isn’t who I thought he was, Mrs. Dawson.”
“What do you mean, Hannah? Has he done something wrong?”
“No, but maybe he’s going to—I think. I mean…”
“You’ve seen the future?” Elaine had worried for some time now that Hannah would someday see something bad that she couldn’t do anything about, and how that might affect her. But this seemed different. “Is it a stable future? One that doesn’t seem to change?”
“Yes! Oh yes!” she buried her face in her hands.
“Do you think it will change for the worse as result of our current discussion?”
Hannah closed her eyes. “No. It won’t change at all. Or at least not so far.”
“Then, it’s safe for you to discuss it with me. And perhaps together we can change it. And if not, perhaps Mr. Dawson can talk to him…”
“No! Please don’t tell him about this. Please?”
“I promise, Hannah. It’ll be between you and me then.” She reached over and grasped her hands firmly. “Now. What is Jack going to do in the future that upsets you so?”
“We won’t be friends anymore.” She whispered.
“When, Hannah? When will this happen?”
“When I’m…older.”
“When you’re an adult?”
“I…think so. It’s kind of hard to tell. I’m as tall as you, but I still feel…like the same person.”
Elaine smiled at her. “As you should, Hannah. Take my word for it. Most adults are quite surprised when they realize for the first time they are adults themselves.”
“Maybe that’s it then. I don’t know.”
“Is that what this is about then? That you won’t be friends anymore? Sometimes that can happen when you grow up, Hannah, and you go your separate ways. It’s not necessarily a bad thing.”
“But I want him to be my friend, Mrs. Dawson! Forever! But he ruins everything! He…” she broke down in tears. “Why did he have to go and…”
Elaine sat down beside her and put her arms around her. “Why don’t you just show me, Hannah? You can do that can’t you? Perhaps it would be easier.”
“Yes. I think so too.” Before Elaine could prepare herself, Hannah pressed her forehead against hers and…her future, together with everything she had seen that night in her dream when she glanced back at the forest meadow, poured into Elaine’s mind with crystal clarity.
§
Oskar, up on his knees now, although hearing nothing, saw everything. And once he saw how upset she was, he was genuinely frightened for Hannah. Whatever was bothering her was clearly serious. He reached out to her, to no avail; she was shutting him out completely. He couldn’t even talk to Mom. All he could do was watch. He held his breath when Hannah pressed her forehead against Mom’s. And he waited.
When they finally separated, Hannah’s eyes remained closed for a few seconds. Oskar was surprised to see Mom flash a sympathetic smile, wipe away a few tears, then kiss Hannah gently on the forehead. How bad could it be then? Mom smiled; at least for a second.
Feeling a bit like a voyeur now, he quietly slipped out of the swing and headed for the front gate. Maybe I’ll walk down towards Sava’s house and wait for Eli. It had only been an hour and he missed her terribly, he realized. Probably because he felt their relationship was in more danger now than it had ever been since before the train ride. And he wasn’t sure why.
In his mind, things were happening a bit too fast right now. All the tragedy and conflict, which he had reluctantly begun to accept as an inevitable part of their unique lives, had suddenly been replaced by – these inner conflicts that he felt incapable of doing anything about. And poor Hannah! After all she had been through with Adrian, and now this, whatever it was, had upset her yet again.
§
“What did I do wrong, Mrs. Dawson? Is this my fault?”
“You’ve done nothing wrong, Hannah. And neither has Jack. Don’t you understand that?”
“No, I really don’t. But even if you’re right, what should I do?!”
“It depends on what you want your future to look like, Hannah.” She paused, then lifted Hannah’s chin up, and looked her directly in the eyes. “You know you could change that future in a heartbeat merely by talking to Jack, don’t you? But I guess you didn’t or you wouldn’t have come to me. One word to him now would end it instantly. Making you uncomfortable for the next five years would be a deal-breaker for him, no matter what he will decide he wants for himself sometime in the future; he cares too much for you to allow it. And there would be no hard feelings, take my word for it. I’ve known Jack almost as long as Eli has. You could end this in a second, and Jack would remain your mentor and steadfast friend.”
Hannah realized the truth of at least part of what she was saying, even as several new futures suddenly opened up before her – all of which caused the second home in the meadow to disappear. The future that had frightened her so much was no longer stable. But if Jack would change his future so dramatically merely at the request of a 14-year-old child, what did that say about his character? She realized Eli’s mama had to be right about all of it, whether she understood it or not.
“But, Mrs. Dawson…” Her feelings were all over the map as soon as she realized that her future was now in her hands and hers alone. She could have what she thought she wanted, or she could do nothing and allow the future to unfold, unchanged. But if she wanted to change her future, she’d have to decide soon, for the longer she waited the worse it would look; at least to Jack, who in retrospect, thanks to her emotional outburst at breakfast, would know immediately that she first saw their future today at the latest.
A sudden movement caught her eye. Through the living room window, she saw Oskar walking slowly down the road toward the Archaeogenetics building and smiled, knowing he would probably wait outside Sava’s door until Eli came out. Dear Oskar! All he ever wanted was to love and be loved by Eli. And yet all these terrible things keep happening to him and still he’s the sweetest boy I know. She thought back to that almost-forgotten bike ride before Eli had been shot; the one Oskar had to remind her of when she first had questions about Jack’s devotion to her; long before she saw her future in the meadow. And the truth of what he had said became suddenly crystal clear: He had told her that there were many kinds of love, and that sometimes it was hard for him to sort them all out and keep them separate. And sometimes, one would blend into the other... Is that what happens to Jack? When I grow up, does Jack love me…like that? The thought still made her uncomfortable, in spite of her new understanding. She couldn’t imagine herself ever being as grown up as Jack. Plus, she had grown so comfortable with and reliant on their current relationship that she couldn’t imagine it changing so drastically. She was more afraid of what she would lose than what she might gain. And after that first view of her future, she was afraid to look any closer at it, for fear of what else she might see. She shook her head. No, she would have to talk to Jack, and end this once and for all.
“So. You’ve decided then.” Elaine sat back on the couch. “I respect your choice, Hannah, but I have one request to make.”
“What’s that, Mrs. Dawson?”
“Please wait a week before you talk to him, just to be certain. Remember, it will have a lasting effect on both of your lives for a very, very long time.” She smiled at her. “And if you need any help, or would rather I told him…”
“No. I should do it myself. I don’t want to hurt his feelings. I love him too much.”
“I understand, Hannah. And I know how hard this will be for you.”
“Are you sure he’ll understand? I don’t even know if I could, if I were him.”
“Perhaps it would be harder if he were your age but he’s an adult now, Hannah. He’s become used to owning up to the mistakes he makes in his life, as have most adults. He’ll understand, and not hold it against you. I’m sure of it.”
“But he hasn’t made a mistake, Mrs. Dawson. Jack doesn’t make mistakes!”
Elaine smiled at her. “Then that will give you something to think about for the next week, won’t it?”