Friends or Lovers?

[[Eden]]

In most of the interviews/speeches I've heard the relationship between Eli and Oskar is referred to as a 'friendship' (f.e. Lina's speech at J. Empire Awards)...
i think the line between friendship and love is quite thin, but I'm pretty sure most of the people I know wouldn't agree with me; anyway, the question is :
are Eli and Oskar in love (romantic love) or just friends?

When Eli kisses him she does it mainly to share her memories, after all... but it's true as well that when they kiss each other before Eli leaves there's no 'practical' purpose in it, buy kissing each other goodbye...

(sorry for any possible language mistakes, i'm too dizzy to write properly)

[metoo]

In most of the interviews/speeches I've heard the relationship between Eli and Oskar is referred to as a 'friendship' (f.e. Lina's speech at J. Empire Awards)...
i think the line between friendship and love is quite thin, but I'm pretty sure most of the people I know wouldn't agree with me; anyway, the question is :
are Eli and Oskar in love (romantic love) or just friends?

When Eli kisses him she does it mainly to share her memories, after all... but it's true as well that when they kiss each other before Eli leaves there's no 'practical' purpose in it, buy kissing each other goodbye...

(sorry for any possible language mistakes, i'm too dizzy to write properly)

This being the film thread, there is only one kiss.

Apart from that, I see the relation between Oskar and Eli in the film, but more so in the novel, as a very deep friendship, or non-sexual love. If romantic love involves sexuality, then their love isn't romantic.

[intrige]

In the novel Oskar clearly has feelings for Eli, and lots of them. The forgets about what he and mom talks about, what they watched on TV, thinks about saving Eli, thinks about what 'she' thinks of him, etc. Pluss, when Oskat figures out Eli's true original gender, he start thinking of himself as gay, and what peers at school would think about it. Why would he do that if he never liked Eli 'in that way'.

Bu the time kids are twelve, they stop to hug and kiss just to show affection in a friendly way, to best friends and parents. I would never do what Eli and Oskar did to each other (kissing, hugging, snuggling) if I didn't think of him/her that way. Eli shows afection to oskar too, pluss; Eli shows Oskar a memory of how he see Oskar. Pretty and hansome and yeah, seen with love.I would say that was proof enough.

For the movie, the original one that is. Many might say it because they don't find O&E relationship very serious, compared to grown-up relationships with sex and marrige or something like it-.. Just kids.. I hate that though, and that idea, but that might be it. Also, someone might look at it as a spiler, since the whole film is about their relationship.
They kiss good bye, yes. No best friends at age 12 would kiss good bye at all, and never like that, for that long. It seems to me that the good bye kiss is somewhat passonate, lingering.. Best friends simply wouldn't do that, not even at my age (18). If girls do kiss when just being friends, it later, normally at my age actually. Iether they ate so confortable with their own sexuallity that they can give quick kisses to their best girl friends. Or being curious, but that is something else. And that's for the girls, who are much less careful to hold hands and give hugs. Oskar is a boy, no matter if Eli is not in the movie, Oskar is. And boys, spesially at his age, won't show affection easily, either way.

I suppose you know all this. I just wanted to express myself

I view romatic love as something in the brain. Not sexul. The body simply produse so much endorphines (make happy hormone) that the brain gets flled with it and affects in the same eria as drugs do. In the back. Now these kind of feelings arenæt sexual at all, otherwise how can sex just be sex for some people? Sex and (crush feelings) are very different. But sex is a way of showing affection yes, but doesn't have to be.(In O&E's case)

[JToede]

Bu the time kids are twelve, they stop to hug and kiss just to show affection in a friendly way, to best friends and parents. I would never do what Eli and Oskar did to each other (kissing, hugging, snuggling) if I didn't think of him/her that way. Eli shows afection to oskar too, pluss; Eli shows Oskar a memory of how he see Oskar. Pretty and hansome and yeah, seen with love.I would say that was proof enough.

Yep, I agree 'trige,you hit the nail on the head.

[mackousko]

I think their love is on the limit of their actual / momentary physiology. Oskar is able to feel something closer to "love" than Eli, because of Eli´s condition. ELi´s age doesn´t give him any advantage. Also there is a high probability , Eli´s feelings would not change with time. On the other hand. Oskar´s feelings would no doubt change with time, / Or better very soon/ because his physiology will change. In what direction is a matter of many possibilities.

[gattoparde59]

They kiss good bye, yes. No best friends at age 12 would kiss good bye at all, and never like that, for that long. It seems to me that the good bye kiss is somewhat passonate, lingering.. Best friends simply wouldn't do that, not even at my age (18).

Yes, that was one thing I thought of. When they kiss like that they are more than just friends and this is not a casual kiss goodbye for a whole bunch of reasons. I have kissed many people, but it is not very often that the kiss really meant something and the meaning is not just sexual, it is something else difficult to put into words.

[[Eden]]

If romantic love involves sexuality, then their love isn't romantic.

Romantic love doesn't have to involve sexuality, but 'longing' and some form of passion at least, imo

[EEA]

Eli and Oskar are in love. "Love is love," that is what Paulo Coelho says in one of his books. There is no reason for love when you love someone you just do. Eli and Oskar do something that other people that find love will not do. They take risks and go on that journey that few people are willing to take.
When I was twelve I saw the way my teacher' eye would chage when she would talk about her husband. That was true love. That is why I do not believe that falling in love is about just about chemicals but about something that cannot be put into words.

[varamiglite]

I think what they have teeters on the brink of being either one. I agree with intrige in that I would never kiss a friend like that, nor would I receive a kiss like that from a friend. There would have to be something more. This sounds cheesy but they almost have a "love without limits" since the adult intimacy doesn't have to come into play (if Oskar is turned before those needs become too strong). They can make it into whatever they want. On the flip-side of the coin they're also not mature enough to understand what that kind of love truly is. I really don't have an answer but if I had to choose, I'd choose that they do love each other, regardless of gender or the fact that Eli eats people.

[gary13136]

It's really difficult to say for certain one way or the other in the movie. I would say "extremely fond of".

In the novel I would say that they are much closer than "just fond of". There's several bedroom scenes; the last one of which suggests that they are getting a lot more physical. That's the interesting thing about the novel; much of it is so vague that you can create your own interpertation. And really no one is right or wrong.

Ultimately I believe it just comes down to what you want to believe.